Boundary Setting

What Is Boundary Setting?

Boundaries are the limits we create to protect our time, energy, and emotional well-being. Healthy boundaries allow us to stay connected to others without losing ourselves in the process.

At Botaitis Therapy Group, we help clients understand and practice boundary setting in ways that feel authentic and sustainable. Whether you struggle to say no, feel guilty asserting needs, or take on too much responsibility, therapy can help you identify patterns, build confidence, and create healthier relationships.

How Do Boundary Challenges Show Up in Different Areas of Life?

In Relationships: Difficulty setting limits can lead to resentment, burnout, or people-pleasing. Boundaries are essential for maintaining mutual respect and emotional safety with partners, friends, and family.

At Work or School: Overcommitment, perfectionism, or fear of disappointing others can cause stress or exhaustion. Learning to say no and define your limits supports balance and productivity.

Within Yourself: Internal boundaries include self-discipline, rest, and self-respect. Many clients discover that boundary work also means honoring their own needs and emotions without shame or justification.

How Does BTG Approach Therapy for Boundary Setting?

Self-Awareness and Clarity: Therapy helps identify where boundaries feel unclear or consistently crossed, bringing awareness to emotional triggers and patterns.

Skill Development: Our therapists teach practical communication tools, assertiveness techniques, and emotional regulation strategies for setting and maintaining boundaries.

Healing Root Causes: Many boundary challenges stem from past relationships, family dynamics, or self-worth issues. BTG therapists help you unpack those origins to create change that lasts.

Empowerment and Practice: We work collaboratively to develop confidence in expressing needs, saying no, and balancing compassion with self-protection.

FAQs About Therapy for Boundary Setting

  • If you often feel drained, resentful, or taken advantage of, it may be a sign that your boundaries are unclear or not being honored. Therapy can help you identify and strengthen them.

  • Yes. Setting boundaries is a learned skill. Through practice and support, clients gain confidence in expressing limits and protecting their emotional energy.

  • Guilt is common, especially if you are used to prioritizing others. Therapy helps you reframe boundaries as acts of care, not selfishness.

  • Not always. A useful way of thinking of boundaries is that they’re a bridge not a wall. Boundaries are about maintaining connection safely and respectfully. They can actually strengthen relationships by fostering mutual understanding.

Meet Our Therapists Who Specialize in Therapy for Boundary Setting

Mary Glennan, AMFT
Liz Heitmann, AMFT
Jonathan Makiri, AMFT

Schedule a Consultation

If you’re ready to explore therapy for boundary setting, we’re here to help. Our therapists provide compassionate, evidence-based care in Santa Barbara and online across California. Call us at 805-636-9890 or schedule your consultation to take the first step in your journey.

Related Readings:

5 Things to Do Before Scheduling Your First Therapy Session

The Benefits of Couples Counseling

Navigating Friendships Across Political Differences

Embracing Love and Relationships Through a Non-Monogamous Lens